Prime Cuteness!

Listen up, Buttercup. When you purchase an f/1.8 prime lens, you can’t just film your silly little “unboxing” video for YouTube and then throw it in your camera bag until, I dunno, you come across the perfect landscape in the distance, only to close the aperture down to a pinpoint with some ridiculously high f-stop!

NO! If you buy a blurryback prime, you — and you alone — have a responsibility to photograph cute animals with blurry backs and post them on the Internet! Period.

35mm Lexy (Shiba-wannabe) on the Lawn

Prime vs. Zoom

You’ll hear a lot of “science” as to why a 35mm or 50mm prime lens will take a better portrait than a zoom. Theories like:

“Less glass means sharper image quality!”
“Wider aperture means a shallow DOF!”
“It’s a faster lens for better clarity and handling low-light!”
“Focal length closely resembles the human eye, minimizing perspective distortion at wide angles!”

Blah, blah, blah, whatever. It’s not frickin’ rocket science. The fact is, a prime lens takes a wicked cat photo because, unlike their telephoto counterparts, they have built-in “CMS control mechanisms” to directly interact with the camera’s CMOS sensor array. These mechanisms are based on old sensor tech, but with a patented magnification algorithm that essentially targets and amplifies any “C-level” pixels that hit the sensor.

CMS (Cuteness Magnification Sensor) technology has been around for a while, but only until ‘lolcats’ re-invented the Internet back in 2006 did it truly hit its stride.

50mm Leo at Christmas

I love you both equally

…sooo…I picked up the Nikkor 35mm prime the other day. I’m not cheating on you, my beloved 50mm! I just needed a closer-quarters “pet lens” for indoor use. I love you both equally.

Anyway, because I am a responsible f/1.8 lens owner, I took a “couple” animal blurrybacks with my new 35mm, as well as my beloved 50mm.

50mm Blaze on the Patio

35mm – Random Dog on the Sidewalk

35mm – Random Dog on the Sidewalk

50mm Roughy at the Office

50mm Hailey on the Patio

50mm Tika on the Lawn

50mm Yoda (Pom) at the Office

50mm Nux (Shiba) at the Office

50mm Kiwi at Christmas

50mm Basil on Christmas Eve

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